I need help, or lessons in self-control

For the past few nights, I've been eating cake icing. Yeah, you read it right. Chocolate fudge cake icing. After Nicole goes to sleep, I pull the tub of sweet chocolaty goodness out of the fridge and lose myself in it's euphoric, endorphin-inducing love. My husband just looks at me and laughs. I'm not sure if he's laughing because I look ridiculous carrying around a container of cake topping, along with spoon and Coke in hand. I'm not sure if the bad part is that I'm consuming this stuff, or that I'm doing it at 10 o'clock at night. I know I should feel bad, or at least guilty, but I don't. I find that indulging in such sweets reduces my stress, and makes me feel so much better. It's like getting a hug from your favorite grandmother.

Now for the even worse part. I brought my icing to work with me today, and have been eating it on the sly. How gluttonous can one person be? Right now, I feel like puking from eating as much as I have. This was/is to be the year I started eating healthier and exercising. From the looks of things, I've not kept that promise to myself at all. Then again, I never set an actual date as to when I would start doing all of those positive things I just mentioned. Maybe sometime after Valentines would be a good choice at this point. Who can really expect me to not eat chocolate when we are on the heels of the commercially-pushed chocolate season? Maybe I can blame society for subliminally sabotaging my diet before I even started it. How's that for putting the blame elsewhere? :)